Classic car mechanic – Design Clangers

‘In the corner of the workshop, Olli Ragbin sits watching events unfold before him’

There is a worrying trend of placing more and more importance on the right of an individual not to be offended. On the face of it, being offended is probably something we’d all like to avoid, no? So perhaps, clamping down on the those doing the offending sounds like a good idea? Well, I guess it does.

The designer of the side indicator on the Citroen Grand Picasso just popped said item lazily under the mirror when with dawning realisation they’d noticed its absence. Perhaps they were momentarily distracted, drifting off in a different direction whilst they were replaying the previous night’s episode of 'Britain’s Got Talent'. Completely overlooking this fairly important safety feature, panic set in and they thought ‘Sod it, I’ll just bob it under the mirror, nobody will notice’.

Well, I noticed. Lazy design doesn’t come in much stronger flavours and every time I see it, my eye shrivels and I silently pray for the despatch of a plague of locusts to wherever it is in France this monstrosity was penned.

Once the designer received their marching orders for the Picasso abomination, I suspect they landed at Jeep and took charge of the rear lights of the 4x4 Renegade. The team as a whole deserve no better than some form of insect infestation for the bland boxiness of this particularly generic car design, but the rear lights in particular, they can only have come from the hand of the Picasso butcher.

‘Yeah, I’ll make ‘em square with a little ‘X’ in the middle, then I can get back to my Wordle for the day’.

But, and this is no different to the day-to-day offence we all take from the usual outpourings of celebrities and politicians, perhaps the bad is a morality check against the good? Perhaps we need dark to appreciate light? Differing views in society re-affirm to all the moral compass which we have and tells us our direction is sound. Just because we don’t agree with someone, doesn’t mean they should be banished to Elba and never be heard from again.

It's time to let the Butcher of Citroen move on and learn from their (many) mistakes. Perhaps I should take less offence (I shall try). Maybe the realisation of their errors may lead to future inspiration and for that, the car world may be a better place.

Let’s take a look of some of this week’s pics to see what’s been occurring.

Shrimp eye Justin untying the techs ready for a days work. He's a tough task master, but he can't let them roam free overnight. They nibble the wiring

I used to have this as a Scalextric car. That and a very peculiar looking 6-wheeled Tyrrell GP car. Shrimp eye loves a mini and this one is very close in looks to his own. I suspect he stood in this spot for 10 minutes muttering the phrase 'lovely that.....'

Last week's Defender 90 with new dampers and springs....

.... and some light refurbishment. If you had to visualise the word 'Sturdy', this is what you would see

I was in London last week and saw this parked on the street. A fully restored Bristol in a deep metallic grey. Simply stunning. This should be exported to Jeep HQ and be the subject of a lecture called 'Boxy done well'. Invite the Citroen gang too, they should listen up